Why Self Help Books Dont Work?

Be positive ,think positive , dont think negative is what we keep on hearing . It is there in every positive attitude book , it is there in ever self help book , it is there is spiritual books too. But still it doesnot work , quite often. Isn't it?

So are all those Self Help books wrong. Is it just feel good factor?. No. What all those books on self talk , positive attitude , self image , are absolutely right. No one achieves anything in life unless one has right attitude and positive frame of mind.

Here we are talking about why inspite of reading lots of Self Help books , reading motivaltional writeups still we dont seem to have positive outlook in one or other areas of life.

Answers lies in simple word-'Belief' and belief is formed by lot of factors which includes upbringing , experiences , perceptions. Brain is most powerful tool ever and it has immense capacity and capabilites. Brain stores everything . One may not be consiously able to recall but its there. All positive experiences we have had , all negative experiences we have had , all negative words spoken by us , all negative words spoken for us by others. It stores everything. With time we forget consiously but subconsious mind doesnot forget anything.

When we read any Self Help book , we know what it is saying is right , We are keen to implement steps suggested in it too but a voice from within stops us to act and even if we force us to act , results are not so encouraging. Slowly we give up.It may be new exercise routine , it may be taking our fears headon ,it may be restructuring our lives,slowly we concede and declare that it wont work for us.

If you have had similar situation , well you are not alone ,that little voice giving negative constantly is problem for many. Negative thinking develops into habit and soon life follows a pattern.If self help books have to work this voice has to turn into positive.

How to do that?. Well if you can do with sheer will power , thats nice but for many people sheer will power doesnot help. One needs to de program before getting re programmed. Like some antivirus don't get installed ,if another anti virus is present. One has to uninstall the previous antivirus to install the new antivirus.

How to deprogram has lot of methods and assuming you are not aware of any and don't intend to join any either I am here by listing some practical points which would help.

1) Get Alert :

Now this require practise because negative voice has developed into a habit.Its automatic and one is often not aware of it. First and foremost thing is to become alert. Try to list down negatives you say in a day. When you do it for first time , you would get shock of your life. (If you do it sincerely). Listing it down is first step.This would make you slowly become alert

2) Replace It :

Once you become alert of negative thinking , replace it with positive. It may be as simple as your negative voice stating that 'today is thursday and thursday are simply not good for me' ,replace it with 'Today is wonderful day. I feel excellent and am raring to go.Today would be highly positive and rewarding day for me'.

3) Write Positives That Occured During The day :

Make a list about positives that occured in the day. Write even smallest positive and be thankful to nature for that. Be humble and grateful for that.

4) When Things Go Wrong :

There would be times when things would go wrong. Don't worry. Don't be too harsh on yourself. Take it easy and understand 'Its just a phase' , figure out what is positive out of this ?. What you could have done better, what did you learn?. Forgive yourself about this and be thankful to nature for giving you opportunity to learn something good from it.

5) Positive Input :

Give positive inputs to brain. Train it to see positives in everything. Mingle with people who are optimistic , read books with positive theme and develop a positive thinking pattern. Again it can't be done unless you do 1,2,3 sincerely.

There is a punchline in a car ad-'Life gives you what you expect' . Silencing negative voice and replacing it with positive frame of mind would bring amazing results in your life.Try for yourself.